By Michael Patrick O’Brien–
As a Catholic living in Utah for most of my life, I have come to appreciate many aspects of the dominant local religion, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The Mormons espouse many important values such as charity, honesty, hard work, and volunteer community service. They also place a strong emphasis on the family, recommending gatherings once a week on Monday night called Family Home Evening.
The LDS Church website explains that Family Home Evening is a “time to strengthen family ties…by learning the gospel together, by listening to each other’s feelings, thoughts and ideas, and by enjoying activities together.” The website recommends the evening start and end with prayer and include music, games, a “light and loving” atmosphere, and even service projects such as helping a neighbor in need.
What a great idea! The Catholic Church and Pope Francis also have strongly emphasized the importance of family life. The Pope’s prepared speech text for September 26, 2015 at the Philadelphia World Meeting of Families proclaimed: “We cannot call any society healthy when it does not leave room for family life.” In his improvised speech given the same night, he told how God’s love for humanity was so great that: “He made the highest expression of love – his own son. And where did he send his son – to a palace? To a city? No. he sent him to a family. God sent him amid a family.”
There are so many obstacles to family time, including school activities, work, cell phones, and various other responsibilities or problems. Yet, the Pope explained in Philadelphia that: “difficulties are overcome with love. Hatred is not capable of dealing with any difficulty and overcoming any difficulty. Division of hearts cannot overcome any difficulty. Only love. Only love is able to overcome. Love is about celebration, love is joy, love is moving forward.” Thus, for love, I believe family time must be planned and scheduled, like any other life event. Having a regular day to plan for, such as a Family Home Evening, is an inspired idea.
I learned this lesson many years ago, fortunately when our children still were young. I decided to start scheduling and blocking out family time as part of my regular calendar, just like I docketed court appearances, client meetings, and business phone calls. Clients asking for meeting time have always been flexible when I told them I was busy (whether for other work or family) at a suggested meeting time. I have never regretted this decision, and neither have my clients or my family. It made me a more engaged lawyer, a happier person, and a better husband and father.
Mike- thanks for posting your thoughts on this. It has been said, “No other success can compensate for failure in the home.” So why not schedule it? It doesn’t demean family time to schedule it. In fact, it puts it on the same level as the many other activities and obligations we have. So often, as busy professionals, we put family time on the “back burner” when it should really be a priority. Thanks again!